Thursday, May 12, 2011

400-408 – • Jill Scott (Essence, April 2011) Commentary: Jill Scott Talks Interracial Dating.  Jill Scott is a three-time Grammy Award-winning artist, writer, actress, philanthropist and mother.

My new friend is handsome, African-American, intelligent and seemingly wealthy. He is an athlete, loves his momma, and is happily married to a White woman. I admit when I saw his wedding ring, I privately hoped. But something in me just knew he didn't marry a sister. Although my guess hit the mark, when my friend told me his wife was indeed Caucasian, I felt my spirit...wince. I didn't immediately understand it. My face read happy for you. My body showed no reaction to my inner pinch, but the sting was there, quiet like a mosquito under a summer dress. //

413-423 – Calls – Let's talk about interracial marriage in the church.  If Jill involuntarily "winces" when she discovers a black man is married to a white woman, does this happen with any other combinations?  So, put together male and female in each of the big ethnic categories:  white, black, Hispanic, Asian, etc.  Do any of them have the same "wince-factor" as a black man and white woman?  Do Asian families still wince if their daughters date a non-Asian?  Have any of you experienced even subtle racism in your churches?  When you were young, what happened when you wanted to date cross-racially?  Did you have a "guess who's coming to dinner" moment with your family?  Are young people today "past" all this racism stuff?

428-437 – Calls –

443-452 – Calls – Christine, a black woman, says she knows why black women wince at black men who marry white women.  She says she has three black uncles who all married white women, and that nearly all her black male friends growing up had all said they would never marry a black woman.  And with illegitimacy at 72% in the black community, they are already in great need of black husbands.

458-508 – Calls – Roger, a black man, says that many black men don't want to date black women because they're too bossy and their standards are too high – they all want "Denzel, Barack, or Kobe."

512-523 – Calls –

523 – Don Rohde @ Galpin Ford (818) 262-2092 (  For the past 39 years, Don's been sales manager at Galpin, the #1 volume Ford dealer in the world for the past 21 years.

528-539 – Calls –

544-554 – Craig Huey ( is running for the 36th Congressional District seat in a special election to be held on Tuesday May 17. If you live in Del Aire, El Segundo, Hermosa Beach, Lennox, Lomita, Los Angeles, Manhattan Beach, Marina del Rey, Redondo Beach, San Pedro, Torrance, Venice, West Carson or Wilmington, you may be able to vote in this election.

558-608 – Andrew Marin, president and founder The Marin Foundation (, a nonprofit that seeks to build bridges between the LGBT community and the religious community, and blogs regularly, his latest book is entitled Love Is An Orientation: Elevating The Conversation With The Gay Community.  If you'd like to contact Andrew directly about maybe a friend or loved one in the gay community, and you've got questions how to handle it, you can email him at, or call him at (773) 572-5983.  The four principles of his ministry  are "Commit, Stay, Reconcile, and Grow."  When the gay community is asked what they want from "us," it comes down to two things, "Don't lie to me," and "Don't leave me."  Do you really mean it when you say, "You can tell me anything" and "I"ll always be here for you"?

612-623 – Andrew Marin,

628-639 – Andrew Marin,

644-656 – Andrew Marin, This is huge!  When a person comes out, we must know it comes at the end of a multi-year process during which they have been struggling daily with the decision.  Predictably, they are very defensive with the pat retorts when you react to their announcement.  It usually ends up in a big fight.  To diffuse that situation, say something like, "It's taken you years to arrive at this point, it's been a long and difficult journey for you, I know.  Now, however, I've only begun my journey in learning how to deal with it.  So, I'm going to need some time to work through it all.  I don't yet know about having your friends over, or holidays and all that.  But, do know, I'm here and I'm not leaving and I love you.  Please be understanding while I begin this journey with you."