400-408 – Thom Miller, (thommiller.org) is a Cleveland mobster turned minister, who now runs the international prison ministry Special Visit (specialvisit.org), and the ministry Kids Tears (kidstears.org) that helps protect children from sexual abuse at the hands of family and friends. In many ways, Ray Liotta's character in Goodfellas is Thom's story, shoe-shine boy to drug dealer to enforcer. Thom was indicted 52 times, convicted 36 times, and the 52nd indictment was for killing a guy in a bar fight. He came to Christ on his own, in solitary, on death row, on his 37th birthday, while serving a 15 year prison term, while reading a stolen King James New Testament as a dyslexic. Broken externally and internally, grieving the crayon pictures his 12 kids mailed him saying "Daddy when are you coming home?", grieving his mother going blind yet crying herself to sleep each night praying "God, save my son." And, grieving the darkness of the only life he'd ever known.
413-423 – Thom Miller,
428-438 – Thom Miller,
443-452 – Thom Miller, and Travis Mendel (facebook.com/mobstertoministermovie, MobsterToMinistermovie.com) a filmmaker hoping to do a movie about Thom entitled Mobster to Minister. Travis began making films in high school and college, and worked on the media team out at Calvary Community in Westlake in 2007, before entering and winning several awards at the 168 Film Festival in 2008 and later at Cannes. Travis heard me say on the show when I was talking to Thom, "somebody ought to make a movie about this," and contacted Thom soon afterwards. Rebekah Score is doing the writing. Travis hopes to make a documentary and later a feature film on Thom's life.
458-508 – Thom Miller,
• In August 2009, Thom's world was rocked when the youngest of his two step-daughters, just 9 at the time and her older sister was 11, handed him a note that basically said, that the bad man was grandpa and he had been hurting them. They had been having a discussion about "no touch areas" and the "bad people" who hurt children, when the little girl ran into the kitchen and handed him the note and ran off. It ended up that grandpa had been raping them for years! He's now in prison. As a result, Thom is driven to expose the reality of child sexual abuse through his ministry kidstears.org, where he has a lot of free, downloadable resources.
• Kids Tears, "Shocking Statistics."
Nearly 25% of child victimizers were age 40 or older, but about 10% of the inmates with adult victims fell in that age range.
Convicted rape and sexual assault offenders serving time in State prisons report that two-thirds of their victims were under the age of 18, and 58% of those--or nearly 6 in 10 imprisoned violent sex offenders--said their victims were aged 12 or younger.
In over 90% of the rapes of children less than 12 years old, the child knew the offender, according to police-recorded incident data.
This problem affects all of us, whether you have children or not. According to the Center for Sex Offender Management, 30 percent of adult sex offenders were sexually abused as children. If we each do our part, we can break the cycle and protect our children from sexual predators.
Here are some other statistics about sex offenders and their young victims that may surprise you and debunk some myths. According to the Bureau of Justice Statistics, in the U.S.:
- Two-thirds (67 percent) of all victims of sexual assault reported to law enforcement agencies were under the age of 18 at the time of the crime.
- One of every seven victims of sexual assault reported to law enforcement agencies was under age 6.
- The year in a male's life when he is most likely to be the victim of a sexual assault is age 4; a female's greatest risk is at age 14.
- Nearly half (49 percent) of the offenders of victims under age 6 were family members.
According to the National Institute of Mental Health, the typical sex offender molests an average of 117 children, although most offenses are never reported.
- 80 percent of convicted adult rapists admit to molesting children.
- 80 to 95 percent of sex offenders assault people they know.
- Less than 30 percent of sex crimes are reported.
- Young victims who know or are related to the offender are least likely to report the crime.
It is estimated that in America there are 60 million childhood sexual abuse survivors.
• If you suspect abuse is occurring in a situation you've seen or heard about, if you see something suspicious, you can call one of these hotlines anonymously, and they'll followup on your tip. (800) 540-4000 – Los Angeles Child Abuse Hotline. (800) 207-4464 – Orange County Child Abuse Hotline. (800) 442-4918 – Riverside Child Abuse Hotline
512-523 – Calls – Were you a victim of child sexual abuse?
528-539 – Calls – Were you a victim of child sexual abuse?
544-554 – Calls – Were you a victim of child sexual abuse?
558-608 – Kaitlyn Stanton, her mom Kimberly, and Dr. Mark Baker.
Today, we do something we've never done on our show, we basically attempt an on-air counseling session – obviously with all the appropriate boundaries in play. Mark is a Clinical Psychologist who runs the La Vie Christian Counseling Centers (laviecounseling.org, KKLA Helpline (800) 801-5242) in Pasadena and Santa Monica.
And Kaitlyn, is the young lady whose question brought us all to tears last week at the Dobson event at Lake Avenue. I began the Q&A by reading her question for Dr. Dobson that went like this, "We talk about absentee fathers all the time and how it affects the family. I'm a 14-year-old girl and last saw my dad shortly after my first birthday. My mom and I often talk about love and forgiveness. But now at 14, I am tired of it and have a hard time feeling love and forgiveness for my father. Help – Kaitlyn."
As we all were wiping away our tears, Dr. Dobson went on to talk a lot about the huge impact fathers have on their daughters. Pointedly, he said that the research shows that if it was a good relationship, daughters will marry a man just like dad – but, if it wasn't, then they'll intentionally look to marry a man very much unlike their father. Fathers have a profound impact either way. Today, Kaitlyn and Mark talk about it.
612-623 – Kaitlyn Stanton, her mom Kimberly, and Dr. Mark Baker.
628-639 – Kaitlyn Stanton, her mom Kimberly, and Dr. Mark Baker.
644-654 – Kaitlyn Stanton, her mom Kimberly, and Dr. Mark Baker.
